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Post by intoanewlife on Feb 9, 2020 18:47:34 GMT
Enough famous people have come out already, there is more than enough 'visibility'. Ah that's good to know, thank you! Can we get the word out please, homophobia is cured, there's no need for any more famous people to come out, thanks everyone! What does celebrities coming out have to do with homophobia *shrug |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 9, 2020 18:49:58 GMT
And it's not just about being gay. If there's any secret that you've kept for years and been terrified of revealing it's helpful to see examples of people who opened up and found that everyone around them was supportive and treated it as far less of a deal than they feared it would be. There are still people — particularly young and vulnerable people — who would rather kill themselves than open up to others so any example of people coming out the other side is important is getting across the message that It Will Be OK.
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Post by intoanewlife on Feb 9, 2020 18:52:54 GMT
And it's not just about being gay. If there's any secret that you've kept for years and been terrified of revealing it's helpful to see examples of people who opened up and found that everyone around them was supportive and treated it as far less of a deal than they feared it would be. There are still people — particularly young and vulnerable people — who would rather kill themselves than open up to others so any example of people coming out the other side is important is getting across the message that It Will Be OK. I don't get the impression he is coming out to everyone now, I get the impression he is coming out to the public now. I think people close to him have known for some time. |
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Post by theatremadness on Feb 9, 2020 19:09:56 GMT
Ah that's good to know, thank you! Can we get the word out please, homophobia is cured, there's no need for any more famous people to come out, thanks everyone! What does celebrities coming out have to do with homophobia *shrug Not even going to dignify that question with even trying to answer it. You know how the two connect, you just want a rise from someone as you usually do from the large majority of your posts on this board. If you don't know how the two connect, well then that's even more worrying bordering on ignorance. |
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Post by intoanewlife on Feb 9, 2020 19:23:19 GMT
What does celebrities coming out have to do with homophobia *shrug Not even going to dignify that question with even trying to answer it. You know how the two connect, you just want a rise from someone as you usually do from the large majority of your posts on this board. If you don't know how the two connect, well then that's even more worrying bordering on ignorance. This is cute coming from the person who chose the bit of my post they felt they could turn into an agreement and ignored the rest. I won't continue this, we all have different options on things. I will repeat however that I was not talking about him coming out being private, I was talking about the other discussions going on about his family, finances and career, which is no ones business. |
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Post by hulmeman on Feb 9, 2020 20:11:55 GMT
If you want to see some thinly veiled homophobia take a look at some of the comments on the Dancing on Ice facebook pages (there are a couple!) There is a fear that J.Barrowman and H.Steps might show some solidarity with P.Schofield and if they do, "they" will never watch again. Their ire is also directed at H and Matt who apparently barely stood up on the ice tonight and should be struck down for their audacity and if they get through (they didn't) it would be because Barrowman kept them in (he didn't) . I suspect that DOI is just a bit to much for the reactionaries to cope with these days.
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Post by kathryn on Feb 9, 2020 20:43:46 GMT
We’re at this odd societal juncture at the moment.
Most people my age and younger in the U.K. honestly do not care, but there’s plenty of people around still - given our ageing population - who obviously still do, and they don’t like being told that they are wrong by young people. They may well realise they are out of step with their children and grandchildren and hide their opinions, but that doesn’t mean they are not there.
And internationally there are totally different attitudes in different countries - which is why Hollywood is so far behind, they need to sell their product internationally.
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Post by Deleted on Feb 9, 2020 20:54:09 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Feb 9, 2020 23:51:51 GMT
Peter Duncan had left Blue Peter in 1984 and suddenly rejoined the next year after Michael had gone. There was no talk about Michael leaving the previous summer but Peter was one of the best presenters the show ever had and had replaced Christopher Wenner in 1980 who was hugely unpopular as he had replaced the legendary John Noakes. An openly gay Children's TV presenter in 1985 would have been interesting. Children's TV had used lots of gay actors in that period notably Michael Staniforth on Rentaghost and the great Kenneth Williams was a Jackanory regular. Also on CITV Christopher Biggins used to present shows and did some continuity work as ITV had the on screen presenter before BBC. Michael Sundin of course tragically died of AIDS in 1989 so might he have found out he was HIV positive in about 1985 and was quietly released. Michael Staniforth also sadly succumbed to AIDS in 1987. I only found this out year's later. As regards Schofe there have been a few merky news sites claiming he was having an affair with a showrunner who was in effect his PA and this younger man left the show and was going to talk to the press. I treat this with a pinch of salt. Phillip's private life is his own but he is a well known celeb and if him and his wife were divorcing or he'd run off with a younger woman then that would have been news as much as him coming out. |
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Post by hulmeman on Feb 10, 2020 11:13:00 GMT
Phillip's private life is his own but he is a well known celeb and if him and his wife were divorcing or he'd run off with a younger woman then that would have been news as much as him coming out. Exactly right! This news was never going to sneak under the tabloid radar. Which is why I have formed the conclusion that all those keyboard warriors saying he should keep it to himself are saying that to disguise their dislike of matters homosexual. |
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Post by marypoppins on Feb 10, 2020 11:29:43 GMT
I don’t consider myself homophobic in the slightest but I do find it sad that this is news worthy because it is essentially a private matter. I find the whole concept of “coming out” sad too because that implies that there is something to be hidden or that isn’t normal. I hope that my children’s generation won’t feel the need to discuss this sexuality with me or anyone else, it’ll just be what it is. I find it odd that people think they have some sort of right to known which gender you are attracted too, like that changes who you are.
I look forward to the day when sexuality isn’t news. Then perhaps people won’t struggle with theirs for so long.
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Post by kathryn on Feb 10, 2020 12:15:56 GMT
There's a fine line between 'private - and no-one else's business' and 'secret, shameful - not to be spoken of in polite company'.
For a long time being gay was the latter, and it did no-one any favours.
Our society is organised around the nuclear family - marriages, parentage, divorces all have to be public knowledge as a result.
Though I notice that Fern and Phil getting a divorce did not prompt nearly as much interest.
Until we live in a world where bisexuality is assumed to be the norm and whether one's partner is male or female is a matter of mild gossip-interest, and nothing more, a public figure coming out will continue to be newsworthy.
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Post by marypoppins on Feb 10, 2020 12:20:25 GMT
No I absolutely don’t mean that anything should be secret. More that you don’t feel the need to announce your sexuality, which is different to making a relationship public, much in the same way that hetrosexual people don’t announce their sexuality.
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Post by kathryn on Feb 10, 2020 12:56:04 GMT
No I absolutely don’t mean that anything should be secret. More that you don’t feel the need to announce your sexuality, which is different to making a relationship public, much in the same way that hetrosexual people don’t announce their sexuality. I think I understand what you’re saying, and that your intention is to be well meaning, but that’s not how it works. People are generally assumed to be straight. There will be a need to “come out” as gay as long as that remains the status quo. Given that the demographic breakdown of sexual identity seems to be reasonably consistent, heterosexuals are still the majority of the population and it does seem that people are 'born that way', it's fairly unlikely that heteronormative assumptions will change any time soon. The best we are likely to achieve is treating it with as much excitement as finding out that someone prefers pineapple on their pizza. |
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Post by vdcni on Feb 10, 2020 14:09:48 GMT
No I absolutely don’t mean that anything should be secret. More that you don’t feel the need to announce your sexuality, which is different to making a relationship public, much in the same way that hetrosexual people don’t announce their sexuality. But as soon as I say my husband in a conversation with someone I am also announcing my sexuality because until that point the assumption is I'm straight. And even now in the UK I'll sometimes not say it because I'm unsure of the reaction. Saying that heterosexual people don't announce it isn't a particularly helpful statement to be honest. |
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Post by Mr Snow on Feb 10, 2020 14:27:50 GMT
A quick flick through this thread shows scant thoughts for his wife.
I don't understand the politics of declaring yourself gay, rather than bi; but it does seem shes the one who faces a painful uncertain future whilst wondering quite who she spent the last 27 years with. That's painful.
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Post by intoanewlife on Feb 10, 2020 15:59:44 GMT
A quick flick through this thread shows scant thoughts for his wife. I don't understand the politics of declaring yourself gay, rather than bi; but it does seem shes the one who faces a painful uncertain future whilst wondering quite who she spent the last 27 years with. That's painful. He loved her for 27 years and said yesterday that he loves her more now than he ever has. His ability to love someone has nothing to do with his sexuality nor is it in anyway at all an indictment on her. |
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Post by intoanewlife on Feb 10, 2020 16:02:10 GMT
DP
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Post by danb on Feb 10, 2020 16:29:10 GMT
I don’t consider myself homophobic in the slightest but I do find it sad that this is news worthy because it is essentially a private matter. I find the whole concept of “coming out” sad too because that implies that there is something to be hidden or that isn’t normal. I hope that my children’s generation won’t feel the need to discuss this sexuality with me or anyone else, it’ll just be what it is. I find it odd that people think they have some sort of right to known which gender you are attracted too, like that changes who you are. I look forward to the day when sexuality isn’t news. Then perhaps people won’t struggle with theirs for so long. Exactly this. |
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Post by alece10 on Feb 10, 2020 18:09:44 GMT
Was upset that I was right. The Mail on Sunday confirmed it was a "media source going to reveal" that made him contact a "damage limitation" company and rush out something within 24 hours. The Mail. What a surprise! |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 10, 2020 18:18:54 GMT
I sometimes wonder how journalists justify their actions to themselves.
"What do you want to be when you grow up?"
"I want to be a journalist. I want to lie and deceive people so often they won't be able to distinguish truth from fiction. I want to trick people into voting against their own interests. I want to end careers and ruin businesses. I want to wreck relationships. I want to harass grieving parents. I want to drive people to suicide. And I want to have such control over what people think that none dare stop me."
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Post by intoanewlife on Feb 10, 2020 18:21:04 GMT
Was upset that I was right. The Mail on Sunday confirmed it was a "media source going to reveal" that made him contact a "damage limitation" company and rush out something within 24 hours. Despicable, but not surprising in the least. Scumbags x |
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Post by intoanewlife on Feb 10, 2020 18:22:16 GMT
I sometimes wonder how journalists justify their actions to themselves. "What do you want to be when you grow up?" "I want to be a journalist. I want to lie and deceive people so often they won't be able to distinguish truth from fiction. I want to trick people into voting against their own interests. I want to end careers and ruin businesses. I want to wreck relationships. I want to harass grieving parents. I want to drive people to suicide. And I want to have such control over what people think that none dare stop me." Careers with highest proportion of psychopaths According to Dutton, the ten careers with the highest proportion of psychopaths are: CEO Lawyer Media (TV/radio) Salesperson Surgeon JournalistPolice officer Clergy Chef Civil servant |
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Post by Deleted on Feb 10, 2020 19:11:18 GMT
A quick flick through this thread shows scant thoughts for his wife. I don't understand the politics of declaring yourself gay, rather than bi; but it does seem shes the one who faces a painful uncertain future whilst wondering quite who she spent the last 27 years with. That's painful. He loved her for 27 years and said yesterday that he loves her more now than he ever has. His ability to love someone has nothing to do with his sexuality nor is it in anyway at all an indictment on her. I'm shocked that someone thinks just because he said he loved her that it makes everything ok. Unless she knew from the day she married him she will be going through all sorts of emotions and second guessing her life, her future etc. If she didnt know then her life has been ripped apart and has been based on a lie. You dont just get passed that with him saying 'I love you'. Its a different type of love and not the one she was signing up for |
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Post by marypoppins on Feb 10, 2020 19:14:18 GMT
No I absolutely don’t mean that anything should be secret. More that you don’t feel the need to announce your sexuality, which is different to making a relationship public, much in the same way that hetrosexual people don’t announce their sexuality. But as soon as I say my husband in a conversation with someone I am also announcing my sexuality because until that point the assumption is I'm straight. And even now in the UK I'll sometimes not say it because I'm unsure of the reaction. Saying that heterosexual people don't announce it isn't a particularly helpful statement to be honest. That’s announcing your relationship, and incidentally your sexuality (assuming of course your gender is obvious), it’s not sitting people down before you even have a date never mind a husband and “coming out”. I have no issue knowing someone’s sexuality (or assumed sexuality given their circumstances, just cos you’re a woman with a husband doesn’t mean your not bi), I just don’t need to be told it separately. Unless I am interested in them sexually it makes no difference to me, or changes who they are. |
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