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Post by londonmzfitz on Aug 8, 2023 17:12:26 GMT
Did it a Miss Saigon a few years ago - guy in my row bang on centre front stalls (not front row, about row D or E), turned his phone on to check the time, then 5 minutes before the interval decided that was a time to scroll through Facebook. As people left for their ices or drinks I walked over and said to the young man "Was that your phone" - no, he pointed in a resigned fashion to the man sitting next to him - possibly his dad, and I said - and politely - it's really distracting. Oh, right, said the man, huffily, I only did it once. No, I said, you did it twice, it's really very distracting. It was once, he said and rolled his eyes. No, it was twice, you checked your phone and then you checked facebook, I said. That would have been enough if his wife, the other side of him, hadn't done a comedy "OooOooooOOo" and giggled .. I really think I might not do it again ... Repeating this because it's still in my head and I don't know that I'd be brave enough to confront the phone user again. After we'd had this confrontation *April 1st, 2015!* I walked back to my seat, and stood back to let the group pass by (phone offender, sarky wife, polite young man) off for their G&T's and the phone offender waved at me to move, full on both hands, loudly saying "move along"!... I said, somewhat startled, "this is my seat", and he huffed past. They went back to their seats through the opposite aisle. The arse. It's nothing new, but I do feel people now are - generally - more up for kicking off about stuff after Covid. It just seems to be the thing, with Twitter, with TicTok, up for a ruck.
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Post by lynette on Aug 8, 2023 17:23:50 GMT
Brave… I’m reluctant to engage with the offender. At Dear England a couple came in just before the start, the wrong way. FOH should really sharpen up on this imo. Meant that my OH and I had to get up and move out of our aisle seats. When I mumbled about the other way, he said loudly something along the lines of what am I making a fuss about. Well, he could see that OH has trouble getting up so at least a very o sorry would have sufficed. Small first world problem but actually first time anyone had responded like that in my experience and the people next to me were also astonished.
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Post by A.Ham on Aug 8, 2023 20:48:41 GMT
Rather like the rude ladies on the end of the row at Crazy For You who didn’t want to get up for me to get to my seat further down the row, so asked me if I couldn’t just go in from the other end. Yes, of course I could, but the indignation and horror that they might actually have to move for someone else was really quite rude.
Not wanting to make a fuss I just went to the other end. Where of course there were two equally ‘older’ ladies, one with a stick. Only this time they couldn’t have been nicer and happily stood up so I could pass. And then chatted with me when I went out at the interval about how wonderful the show was. Such a contrast - some people!
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1,481 posts
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Post by steve10086 on Aug 8, 2023 21:25:42 GMT
Brave… I’m reluctant to engage with the offender. At Dear England a couple came in just before the start, the wrong way. FOH should really sharpen up on this imo. Meant that my OH and I had to get up and move out of our aisle seats. When I mumbled about the other way, he said loudly something along the lines of what am I making a fuss about. Well, he could see that OH has trouble getting up so at least a very o sorry would have sufficed. Small first world problem but actually first time anyone had responded like that in my experience and the people next to me were also astonished. I’d confused. Shouldn’t the person trying to get to their seat be the one posting about bad behaviour, not you?
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Post by Deleted on Aug 8, 2023 21:28:57 GMT
I'll always go in the via the nearest aisle and as I like to sit near the end of rows its not usually an issue. But I have on occasion when in the middle of a row done a quick judgement call which side it is quicker to get in from based on number of people or if there are more older people on one side than I may have gone in the other.
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Post by marob on Aug 8, 2023 22:07:44 GMT
Had something similar at the last run of Joseph at the Palladium. Three or four aged people sat on the aisle, with my seat just the other side of them. I said “Sorry, I’m just along there” or something similarly apologetic, only to be greeted with an indignant “couldn’t you have gone the other way?” I never replied to that. I don’t like to inconvenience anyone, but if you’re at the end of a row and take your seat early you can expect to be asked to move.
As it happened I noticed during the interval that at the other end of the row was a wheelchair space, which was in use. Wish I’d noticed that at the time to point it out to her.
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Post by lynette on Aug 10, 2023 22:39:01 GMT
Brave… I’m reluctant to engage with the offender. At Dear England a couple came in just before the start, the wrong way. FOH should really sharpen up on this imo. Meant that my OH and I had to get up and move out of our aisle seats. When I mumbled about the other way, he said loudly something along the lines of what am I making a fuss about. Well, he could see that OH has trouble getting up so at least a very o sorry would have sufficed. Small first world problem but actually first time anyone had responded like that in my experience and the people next to me were also astonished. I’d confused. Shouldn’t the person trying to get to their seat be the one posting about bad behaviour, not you? Right to be confused. I am the grumpy ‘aged person’ who says go the other way but this person raised his voice to me. Ah, i deserved it, didn’t I? But he could so easily have seen he should have gone the other way, the difficulty of OH getting up ( we always wait ) and it was just a min before the start. No excuses, Lynette, you are a disgrace to the theatre going public and need a retraining course on how to behave.
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Post by ceebee on Aug 11, 2023 7:17:12 GMT
I’d confused. Shouldn’t the person trying to get to their seat be the one posting about bad behaviour, not you? Right to be confused. I am the grumpy ‘aged person’ who says go the other way but this person raised his voice to me. Ah, i deserved it, didn’t I? But he could so easily have seen he should have gone the other way, the difficulty of OH getting up ( we always wait ) and it was just a min before the start. No excuses, Lynette, you are a disgrace to the theatre going public and need a retraining course on how to behave. Just a minute before the start is not really on - I can't stand those folk who turn up with a minute to go and are right in the middle of the row. That said, we all make mistakes - I totally misread my numbers at the final night of Only Fools and Horses and in trying to avoid making people get up, chose the wrong side and ended up making 2/3 of the row stand up. I was so embarrassed and personally apologised to each person for the inconvenience. (And that is the lesson for me, I think - human courtesy should be that if you cause somebody an inconvenience, no matter how small or large, simply apologise for it and admit your mistake - I bet if the person who raised his voice to you had been more apologetic for your inconvenience, you would have probably have been okay with it.)
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Post by steve10086 on Aug 11, 2023 9:15:07 GMT
Right to be confused. I am the grumpy ‘aged person’ who says go the other way but this person raised his voice to me. Ah, i deserved it, didn’t I? But he could so easily have seen he should have gone the other way, the difficulty of OH getting up ( we always wait ) and it was just a min before the start. No excuses, Lynette, you are a disgrace to the theatre going public and need a retraining course on how to behave. Just a minute before the start is not really on - I can't stand those folk who turn up with a minute to go and are right in the middle of the row. That said, we all make mistakes - I totally misread my numbers at the final night of Only Fools and Horses and in trying to avoid making people get up, chose the wrong side and ended up making 2/3 of the row stand up. I was so embarrassed and personally apologised to each person for the inconvenience. (And that is the lesson for me, I think - human courtesy should be that if you cause somebody an inconvenience, no matter how small or large, simply apologise for it and admit your mistake - I bet if the person who raised his voice to you had been more apologetic for your inconvenience, you would have probably have been okay with it.) What mistake? Trying to get to your seat while someone mumbles a complaint about you?!
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Post by ceebee on Aug 11, 2023 10:03:28 GMT
What mistake? Trying to get to your seat while someone mumbles a complaint about you?! Well in my incident, it was definitely my mistake by entering the row from the wrong side. My point really was that it is better to try and be pleasant - everybody is there for the show and it's no hardship to me if somebody is less mobile to take an alternative route. Though if i had mobility issues or was of a larger frame, I would probably wait until as late as possible to take my aisle seat if i knew that getting out of it was difficult.
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Post by Dave B on Aug 11, 2023 11:05:01 GMT
Though if i had mobility issues You might find it to be sometimes the reverse for some people. No matter how busy the theatre is, in your row you can guarantee you have a seat which might help with said mobility issues!
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Post by mkb on Aug 11, 2023 11:26:15 GMT
Just a minute before the start is not really on - I can't stand those folk who turn up with a minute to go and are right in the middle of the row... There is nothing wrong with taking your seat a minute before time. You are not late. (And even lateness itself, when it happens, is usually due to circumstances entirely outside your control.)
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Post by mkb on Aug 11, 2023 11:32:01 GMT
Brave… I’m reluctant to engage with the offender. At Dear England a couple came in just before the start, the wrong way. FOH should really sharpen up on this imo. Meant that my OH and I had to get up and move out of our aisle seats. When I mumbled about the other way, he said loudly something along the lines of what am I making a fuss about. Well, he could see that OH has trouble getting up so at least a very o sorry would have sufficed. Small first world problem but actually first time anyone had responded like that in my experience and the people next to me were also astonished. This highlights that people with mobility issues tend to need aisle seats, but are then faced with the problem of having to keep getting up and down to let people into the row. Blame, I think, should be directed at the theatre for not providing suitable legroom, rather than at either the poor person sat there or the people trying to get past.
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Post by longinthetooth on Aug 11, 2023 11:56:03 GMT
Woman in a box at a matinee yesterday, with bare feet resting on the edge for all to see.
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Post by mkb on Aug 11, 2023 12:01:19 GMT
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Post by Jon on Aug 11, 2023 12:03:11 GMT
Woman in a box at a matinee yesterday, with bare feet resting on the edge for all to see. I have this issue with people putting their feet on seats in general, it's not your home so don't do it!
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Post by Deleted on Aug 11, 2023 13:06:06 GMT
For someone with mobility issues when to take a seat is always hard to judge. They need to leave time to arrive if they cannot move quickly, likely don't want to/cannot stand in foyer bar. Need to give themselves time to get down the aisle and to a seat plus throw in the issue of seeing seat numbers in the dark which a lot of us have and must be worse for older people whose eyesight won't likely be as sharp.
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Post by capybara on Aug 14, 2023 11:01:41 GMT
I appear to be on a bad run. Since the non-stop distractions at Mrs Doubtfire, I have endured someone munching on crisps during the more harrowing moments in The Pillowman, as well as having to move seats during the interval at both shows at Chichester on Saturday.
During Rock Follies, a family arrived close to ‘curtain up’ and spent ages fannying around trying to work out their seats. We were five minutes over the start time and they still hadn’t taken their seats, while the ushers were just standing around watching them. I know staff at the Minerva are probably volunteers but still. They eventually sat down and chomped on sweets in noisy bags throughout the first act. We moved a few rows down.
Then at Sound of Music, a man behind me who had clearly been dragged along by his wife spent the entire first act taking out individually wrapped sweets from his pocket and unwrapping them. Usually I think oh well they’ll finish them within the first 10/15 mins of the show but this slob just kept devouring them for the full 75 minutes. No amount of dirty looks affected his entitlement. We had to move a lot further back to be able to enjoy the second act in peace.
I’m of course venting in what I consider to be a theatre fan’s safe space on here. Many people I know would probably just shrug it off. But how do you deal with the constant anxiety that some selfish Pr**k is going to ruin your experience? It doesn’t seem like there’s any will from theatres to actually tackle this issue…
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Post by A.Ham on Aug 14, 2023 12:28:12 GMT
Your last paragraph sums it up for me - I end up feeling so worked up when it happens that it spoils my enjoyment. At other times, when I know a big moment is starting (think I Dreamed A Dream or Bring Him Home at Les Mis for example) I often feel anxious that it’s going to be ruined at any moment by ‘Karen who’s sat two rows away’ joining in 😡
Unfortunately it does compound my belief that some people shouldn’t be allowed out in public!
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Post by Jon on Aug 14, 2023 12:35:59 GMT
TBH if you fear other people will ruin your experience, you would never leave the house for anything and that to me is not a healthy mindset.
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Post by capybara on Aug 14, 2023 12:53:17 GMT
TBH if you fear other people will ruin your experience, you would never leave the house for anything and that to me is not a healthy mindset. While I do agree with the sentiment, when something happens repeatedly, it’s very hard not to be concerned about it.
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Post by BVM on Aug 14, 2023 13:18:57 GMT
I’m of course venting in what I consider to be a theatre fan’s safe space on here. Many people I know would probably just shrug it off. But how do you deal with the constant anxiety that some selfish Pr**k is going to ruin your experience? It doesn’t seem like there’s any will from theatres to actually tackle this issue… This sums it up for me too - I have terrible anxiety seeing certain musicals in the UK that some selfish Pr**k is gonna ruin the experience as you say! It really escalated for me post the lockdowns and I did get to a point where I would be nervous to do my fave thing on earth (see musicals). It wasn't helped by fact that just post Covid I saw the Les Mis concert and Palladium Joseph multiple times both of which were peak offenders for drunk singing badly behaved audiences. I actually saw a fight at the Les Mis concert which for someone who has baseline anxiety anyway was an awful experience. Sorry I can't offer much of a solution. I do find that things are a bit better now but part of this is that I am mainly avoiding "family" musicals. But yes, it's sad times when you have to be nervous doing the things that you should find relaxing!
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Post by BVM on Aug 14, 2023 13:20:41 GMT
TBH if you fear other people will ruin your experience, you would never leave the house for anything and that to me is not a healthy mindset. While I do agree with the sentiment, when something happens repeatedly, it’s very hard not to be concerned about it. Very much so. I know the logic is "nothing you can do about it so don't sweat it" but I can't override the anxiety I have sadly!
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Post by sph on Aug 14, 2023 14:57:30 GMT
My personal hate is people who chat and comment on the show to each other throughout. It's like being sat next to a less witty version of the old men from The Muppets.
I sat in front of three women at Gypsy when it was at the Savoy and after they chatted all the way through the overture, they continued to give a running commentary throughout. "Ooh didn't Barbara Windsor do this song once?"
I think I already posted in here about the middle-aged couple behind me who acted like lovesick teenagers all the way through My Fair Lady too. Knocking back champagne and far more interested in each other than anything happening on stage.
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Post by ceebee on Aug 14, 2023 21:59:07 GMT
Who the hell thought tubs of crisps was ever a good idea for the theatre?
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